Archive for May, 2009

May 20 2009

the latest in a long line of failed experiments: how to say ‘no’ (trigger warning)

how fucked, frankly, is this?  although i do think that fostering assertiveness and negotiation skills in girls and young women is important it is not, at all, the root of the problem. until we discuss consent in schools, and change attitudes about the availability of (predominantly) female bodies, and the male ‘right to sex’ – not to mention step up and make rape a real and vitally serious crime, not just something society pretends to frown on in public and in writing, while condoning gender-based violence through action, policy, and media – this is going to be a problem.

women do not need, in addition to the myriad of pre-existing tag-lines, to be told that violence and rape are their fault because – though they were taught how in school – they just didn’t say ‘no’ assertively enough.

point of fact: one ‘no’, however softly said, ought to be enough.

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